#1 Wanting to Quit...

Learning is not for the faint of heart…

Life is ever-changing… I’m grateful mine has had many twists and turns that have taken me from the lush hills of Waimea, Hawaii as a youngster to the mountains of Colorado as a horse-crazy adult.

The chapter I’m starting at the moment involves A LOT of learning. Steep curves that sometimes leave me cross-eyed and grabbing for the hand rails. I’ve been on every side of the learning process- the beginner, the mentor, the beginner, the teacher, the beginner…. I’m sure you can relate. We are all beginners in some areas of our lives and teachers/mentors in others. Both roles have their unique set of challenges. Today, I’ve been reflecting a lot on the challenges of the beginner…

All of us have been beginners at one time in our life and some learn to avoid it at all costs because it can be UNCOMFORTABLE to put it mildly. A few of the common ways to deal with this discomfort are:

• Wanting to quit

• Reframing the thing we’re doing to convince ourselves we don’t really want to do it. “I’ll do it when the timing is better”, “I’ll do it when the weather is better”, “I don’t really want to do this stupid thing after all”.

• Telling ourselves mean things: “I’m never going to get it”, “There’s something wrong with me”, “I’m the only one who is struggling- everyone else is having the time of their lives (thank you Facebook 😆)

So… here’s the kicker- WE ALL DO THIS!! Or at least most of us do. It’s our brain’s attempt to keep us safe and comfortable.

I’ve learned (and keep learning) that awareness of this pattern of the beginner is KEY!

Recently, I’ve been learning with a man who’s spent his life studying horses. He’s an old cowboy whose life was changed years ago when he met Ray Hunt. He’s got similar roots to me, but different ways of presenting things to the horse and I feel like I’m learning to do everything all over again. I’ve had moments of wanting to quit because it’s uncomfortable, awkward, and I often feel like my shoe laces are tied together. But I know this is part of the journey.

In a past chapter of my life, I taught 4th graders and shared this truth with them- that if you are feeling awkward and things are hard- it’s a sure sign that you’re learning. I shared the strategy of creating a mental picture to go along with the awkward feeling- like a bright purple flag waving back and forth or colorful fireworks crackling above your head to signal that “I’m learning”! It was always fun to hear what they’d come up with and how they used it.

Recognizing this pattern is so powerful. Once you recognize it, you can celebrate that you’re learning and take the opportunity to talk to yourself the way you would a friend instead of like your worst enemy.

If you feel like sharing, I’d love to hear what you do to keep yourself in a learning frame of mind when things get challenging. I'd love it if you'd leave a comment below.

I hope these words are a reminder to you that we all feel these feelings- it’s what we do with them that keeps us in the game or sets us up on the sidelines. As the quote above says, I’ve never been this version of me…

I’m glad you’re here. In the next few blog posts, I'll share a variety of strategies to keep you in the game of learning (next week’s will be a video). I hope they shine a light on areas of your journey that you can celebrate and those that can be improved.

Here’s to beginnings!

💕

Molly